Let’s Just Hope That Ford Is Saying Everything Poorly

What is it they say about being careful of what you wish for?

A few weeks ago, I practically begged — actually, I think I DID beg – for Lions owner Bill Ford Sr. to say something, anything, about the state of his football team. You know, that whole winless 2008, one-win-in-more-than-a-year thing. It would be nice, I wrote, if Ford would prove to us that of all the bad things an owner can be indicted of, he’s not guilty of the worst: that he doesn’t care.

Maybe I like it better when he stays quiet.

It’s not so much WHAT Ford said yesterday, reported first by Tom Kowalski and MLive.com — although it wasn’t pleasant to read. It was what he DIDN’T say — and how he DIDN’T phrase what he did say, when talking about the future of the franchise and that of COO Tom Lewand and acting GM Martin Mayhew.

To wit: when asked if the stench of a possible 0-16 season would mean that the Lions would blast a big hole in the vault and rescue what little credibility was left by hiring a “football guru”, Ford said, “It depends. I don’t know about the odds (of hiring a GM with total authority). Let’s see who’s available and what experience they have and see if they fit in any of our slots.”

OK, what he SHOULD have said: “I think that since the model of most winning teams has a brilliant football mind at the top, then we would be foolish not to look at that hard as a model for our organization.”

Translated: I would like to emulate the Patriots and the Colts and bring that type of org chart to the Lions.

Fan reaction: Thank God.

When asked if he was happy with Mayhew’s performance so far, Ford said, “Oh yeah, very.”

What he SHOULD have said: “Martin was placed in a very difficult situation and it’s kind of unfair to judge his performance based on that. I appreciate his hard work.”

Translated: An acting GM has no real influence over the on-field performance when he’s brought in after three games have been played. So how can I answer that intelligently?

Fan reaction: That seems fair.

Finally — and this is a biggie — Ford said this when asked about the job security of head coach Rod Marinelli: “I don’t know, I haven’t made up my mind. I’m leaving it open.”

What he SHOULD have said: “We’ll evaluate Rod at the end of the season, as we always do with our coaching staff.”

Translated: What do you want me to do? Fire him now before I get a chance to talk to him and fire him in private?

Fan reaction: OK, but just see that you do it.

After reading Kowalski’s scoop of a story, I’m trying to remain calm and level-headed. Three things pretty much set fans off: 1. The idea of doing things by committee — one that would include Ford, Lewand, and Mayhew when it comes to the next hire; 2. The throwaway comment re: Mayhew’s performance; and 3. The “leaving it open” remark re: Marinelli.

Here’s, basically, what Ford is saying — before you jump off the Ambassador Bridge: I want Tom Lewand and Martin Mayhew around, in some capacity. We’re going to hire a new football person. I haven’t made up my mind yet about the coach.

I have no problem keeping Lewand. His side is business, and by all accounts he actually does a pretty good job with it. I can even tolerate Mayhew sticking around, though he’s a Matt Millen Man — as long as it’s in a watered down, subordinate role. And I still truly believe that Marinelli will be canned. I think Ford’s “leaving it open” comment was just a poor way of saying it. And it’s making the fans crazy nervous.

But it’s also obvious that I’m not in the majority.

The fan base wants everyone gone — excluding maybe the poor secretaries and administrative assistants who are guilt-free here. The idea of Tom Lewand and Martin Mayhew still being employed creeps people out. I understand that. But will we really care if those guys are still around if a new football man arrives and is given the authority that he needs? And will we care if they’re here if a new coach is in place?

But here’s where you might have me. Ford’s hiring history has been as checkered as a chess board. And the new man might have to swallow being part of a committee with Lewand and Mayhew. That makes the job less attractive for the type of person this situation craves.

So we’ll see. But the comments to Kowalski is far from a piece of candy in the fans’ stockings this Christmas.

So shame on me for beseeching Ford to speak to us. What was I thinking?

If Only Ford Would Stop Being Absentee In His Ownership

There are the buffoon owners of sports teams. The Mark Cubans and Jerry Joneses of the world. Those bozos who make a spectacle of themselves, whether at courtside or on the sidelines. Jawing with officials, stomping their feet when things don’t go their team’s way. There are the bellicose owners, those insufferable boobs who whine and publicly castigate their players, their coaches. The George Steinbrenners and the Al Davises of the world. You just have to know that if Donald Trump were to own a team, he would be in one of these categories.

This morning, I must say that I’m rather jealous of fans whose teams are owned by the misfits, the jerks, the bozos.

For at least with the Cubans and Joneses, you know that, if nothing else, they care.

It’s getting tiresome to hear, through the grapevine, of how much Bill Ford Sr. cares about winning. It’s old to rehash how nice he is, how terrific of an owner he is to work for. Irksome to wring your hands about his being loyal to a fault, wondering how much damage that’s doing in the long-term.

If only he would talk to us.

Ford may be the most frustrating and maddening of all the sports owners. This is because he is, for all intents and purposes, an absentee owner. Some absentees own from afar. The Red Wings were owned before Mike Ilitch by Bruce Norris, who toward the end of his reign was holed up in Florida, rarely showing his drunken face while his team burned. Even the Pistons, before the frequently-seen Bill Davidson, were owned by Fred Zollner, The Z. Zollner was another absentee, who had attended one or two games, total, over the last couple years of his ownership.

You never heard a peep from Norris or Zollner. It was creepy, in a way.

Ford is creepy.

There were reports that Ford was at the field named after his family yesterday as his team vomited and defecated all over the gridiron in a shameful effort in the annual Thanksgiving Day game. A 47-10 game that, when you think about it, wasn’t even as close as the score indicated. No telling what the Tennessee Titans would have done to the Lions if they put forth a maximum effort in the second half, after a 35-10 halftime lead satiated them, like men content after gorging themselves on turkey and all the fixings. Still, the Titans, in their feast-induced stupor, managed to hold the Lions scoreless while tacking on four field goals.

But Ford, as usual, wasn’t available to the media — before or after the game. Some owners make the media available to them, whether the media likes it or not. They seek out the nearest tape recorder, the nearest TV camera they can find, and go off. Can you imagine Jones, the Cowboys owner, if his team had laid such an egg on the national stage? You’d have to have a straitjacket at the ready. And a tranquilizer gun.

Ford has never, that I can recall from 38 years of following and covering the team, displayed any passion, publicly, about his football team. The only confirmation we get of his supposed disdain for losing comes from those close to him. If it weren’t from these reports, which are like those you got from the front during pre-television wars, we wouldn’t have a clue as to what Ford thinks. We wouldn’t know if a display such as the one perpetrated against Lions fans and indeed, the nation, yesterday bothered Ford in the least bit. Actually, when it comes to yesterday, we don’t know. The reports from the front haven’t come in yet.

If I owned a football team, and if my product was so awful that the fans were so lethargic as to not even boo the carnage, and if I saw my stadium empty out shortly after halftime like sand draining from the top half of an hourglass, I’d walk out to the 50-yard line, demand a microphone, and issue a public apology — making sure the cameras were rolling so it could be preserved for posterity.

Ray Kroc did something similar once. Kroc, the McDonald’s hamburger magnate, once owned the San Diego Padres. And after another horrible performance by his team, Kroc angrily commandeered the public address microphone and told the few fans remaining that he was sorry. They laughed at Ray Kroc a lot, but nobody could accuse him of not caring.

The biggest indictment of any team owner in pro sports isn’t that he’s incompetent. Isn’t that he’s a stooge. Isn’t that he is an embarrassment to his constituency. Isn’t that he meddles and micro-manages.

The biggest indictment is that he doesn’t care.

True or not, that’s the impression most Lions fans have of Bill Ford. Actually, they’ve had that impression for years now, maybe even decades. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t truly care if his team wins two games or ten. Doesn’t really make a difference to him if the Lions make the playoffs or not. Those close to him will scoff at this notion. No, no, they say — Ford cares. Boy, does he care. Losing grinds him. He wants a Super Bowl in the worst way. Well, they got the “worst way” part right.

OK, so if Ford cares, why doesn’t he talk to us?

If he only knew how much it would mean to the fan base if Ford simply spoke to them. Just went on record, telling of his feelings and his vision and what all this losing does to him. Oh, how they would appreciate it if he would acknowledge that the product is unacceptable, and even though he hasn’t been able to get it right in 44 years of ownership, by God he’s going to keep trying until he does.

Sources close to Ford say this is an actual photo taken of him

It wouldn’t, at all, make up for all the years of lousy football in this town, but I guarantee you it would soothe some feelings.

It would be even better if such public words were accompanied by a ziggying given to coach Rod Marinelli. A combo platter: canning the coach and declaring outrage of the situation at the same time.

When Matt Millen was finally relieved of his duties, Ford again was holed up. Nothing came from him beyond a written statement. Another opportunity wasted to show the fans this alleged care and passion we keep hearing about from those ever-reliable “sources close to Ford.”

The Lions fans clearly are not all that hard to please. That’s made evident every year, when Ford Field is routinely sold out despite the won/loss record. Recently, a sellout streak was ended that is normally reserved for the truly successful franchises. Not for those who are in the throes of a 31-93 mind boggler. That’s a .250 winning percentage, folks. Three losses for every win. For nearly eight years. Truly mind boggling.

So these not-too-hard to please fans would absolutely eat it up if Ford would go public, even in the form of an impromptu presser, and muse about his football team. They may not be totally satisfied with his words, but just the fact that he even uttered some would be enough for a lot of the base. But he would need to do it more than just once a year. And, of course, it would still need to be accompanied by sound football decisions.

I’m not asking Bill Ford to stand on the sidelines and react like a normal fan to the ups and downs of a typical football Sunday. I’m not asking him to berate officials and humiliate anyone. I’m just asking, begging, for one thing, and one thing only.

Talk to us, Mr. Ford. That’s all.

Again, Ford Wonders What All The Fuss Is About

If only we could all not worry, like Bill Ford Sr. doesn’t worry. If only we could all exhibit the patience of Job, and refrain from hand-wringing. If only we could emerge every so often, unruffled, tanned and relaxed, and ask what all the fuss is about.

Ford, the Lions owner and centurion, did it to us again yesterday. The 82-year-old showed his face at Lions HQ in Allen Park, ostensibly to talk about franchise giant Charlie Sanders and his induction into the Pro Football Hall of Fame a week from Saturday. And, as he’s done so often in the past, Ford either sounded like: a) the voice of reason; or b) Nero.

To wit, according to Nicholas Cotsonika of the Free Press:

“I’m usually optimistic anyway going in. But I think this year will be a little bit special.”

“I could see right off the bat that they (president Matt Millen and coach Rod Marinelli) were compatible … I got to know Rod much better and I could see where they would mesh. You don’t want to break up a combination like that.”

On reports of Millen’s impending firing last season:

“I don’t know where those originated. I sure never said anything even approaching that — or if I did I didn’t mean to.” (laughs)

“I didn’t say, ‘You’re safe, don’t worry about it,’ in so many words (about Millen’s job security). But by the same token, I never intimated to him that he wasn’t safe. It was business as usual.”

Boy, he’s got THAT right, at least.

On whether his judgment of Millen is clouded because of his personal like of him:

“It’s possible. But I think if you like somebody and you believe in the same things that they believe in, I don’t know what other yardstick to put against it.”

On the 2007 season:

“I’m always an optimist before the season starts … When the team doesn’t live up to it, you’re very disappointed.”

“Thank goodness I can put that behind me and look forward. If I dwelled on the past, I’d shoot myself. Really, I’ve never felt that way. But if I were a fan, I could understand it.”

Talk amongst yourselves.

During the 1995 season, the Lions sitting at 3-6, Ford told the media that coach Wayne Fontes had to make the playoffs to keep his job. They did that, thanks to a 7-0 streak to finish the year. Then in the playoffs, the Lions got whalloped by the Eagles, 58-37 — a game in which they trailed at one point, 51-7.

Surely, the scribes and blabbermouths on the radio said, Fontes cannot possibly survive this debacle. For several days, speculation ran rampant that Fontes would be fired. That nobody could lay an egg like that and keep his already-tenuous job.

Ford emerged a couple weeks later, and he said, basically, that Fontes had achieved the mandate, and made the playoffs. His job was safe. And again, Ford wondered what all the fuss was about. He suspected, apparently, that we would think that simply making the playoffs, then getting torched on national TV, would be acceptable.

Sometimes I wish I had his countenance. Better on my health.